Valentine week - 2

You can express sometimes without words. Actually that adds to the mystery already in love.
Let us see what significance some symbols of love have.

Heart- There is a famous line, “A hundred hearts would be too few to carry all my love for you.” 
A heart through which a cupid’s bow passes is a famous symbol of love. The arrow is rumored to have 
diamond tips. All the cultures accept heart as symbol of not only love but also joy, charity and compassion. 
The heart in our body is said to be the seat of love and the veins of the heart are attached to the third 
finger of the left hand in which wedding rings are worn. This belief and tradition is age old. 
Even Alchemists and Magicians used this symbol while dealing in love issues. It is graphically 
represented as a triangle (inverted).

Rose- When we say “I love you” to someone the picture of a red rose automatically comes 
to our mind. Proposals are incomplete without gifting a red rose. This flower symbolized 
love, peace and forgiveness. There are 72 different colors in which roses are available.
Each color denotes a different emotion.On Valentines Day (14th February every year)
the florist’s shops are flooded with red roses. If you have a sweet-heart then you 
should consider yourself lucky that you can present someone with this amazing love symbol. However, be 
careful not to allow any thorn hurt your heart-beat while you present him or her with the flower.

Lavender -- Enchantment and Uniqueness

Orange -- Fascination
Pink (Dark) -- Thankfulness, Friendship and Admiration
Red -- Love, Respect and Courage
Peach -- Modesty, Gratitude, Admiration and Sympathy
Pink (Pale) -- Grace, Joy and Happiness

Deep Red -- Beauty and Passion
White -- Innocence, Purity, Secrecy, Silence, Reverence, Humility and True Love
Yellow -- Joy, Friendship, Jealousy, Hope and Freedom
Black -- Farewell
Red/White -- Unity or Engagement
Yellow/Orange -- Passionate Thoughts
Yellow/Red -- Congratulations

Rose bud -- Beauty, Youth and a Heart Innocent of Love
Red Rosebud -- Purity and Loveliness
White Rosebud -- Girlhood
One Dozen Red Roses -- "I Love You"
Single Red Rose in Full Bloom -- "I Love You"
Tea Roses -- "I'll Remember Always"

Cupid- The word Cupid in Greek means desire. In some renowned paintings 
cupids are shown blindfolded to highlight the fact that love is blind. It is said that when 
Cupid strikes individuals love blossoms. It is amazing to think the logic why people fall 
in love? Well! There is no definite answer to this question. It is believed that Cupid 
(son of Goddess Venus) strikes the arrow and people fall in love. It is believed that after 
Cupid strikes the arrow people fall in love with the person they see first. On Valentine’s Day 
centerpieces, cards and paintings of Cupid are sold in plenty punching a hole in the pocket of many lovers.

Apple- A symbol of ecstasy, fertility and abundance as well as love. History and 
even pre-history proves that apple played a big role in igniting and nurturing love. 
Dinoysus (Greek wine god) offered this love-fruit to Aphrodite to win love. 
Apple also signifies feminism. It is a symbol of peace and adoration amongst the 
Chinese people. The Apple is a testimony to the adage "big things come in small 
packages." At her wedding to Zeus, Gaia supplied Apples to Hera signifying long love and union. 

Harp- The harp is a very old musical instrument and symbolizes love. This is associated 
with music, art and poetry. Harp has a mythological connection with Celtic 
civilization. This is supposed to be the bridge between the heaven and earth. 
In Norway and Iceland, harp means higher form of love which leads to paradise.

Love Knot- The concept of love knot crept into the society from young Muslim women. 
These ladies used to send messages of love woven via knots in a carpet. This actually 
is an Arabic tradition. The concept of love knot exists till date.

Love Birds or Doves- Doves are believed to be birds who reflect love, 
innocence, purity and meekness. It is also believed that on Valentine’s Day they find 
their mates. On Valentine’s Day shop sell centerpieces of two doves, preferable 
made of ceramic or glass. These are favorite gifts of love.

Ribbons and laces have been associated with love and romance since the 
days when a knight used to ride into a battle sporting the scarf or handkerchief 
presented to him by his ladylove. In the bygone times, laces were used 
making women's handkerchiefs. It was also usual for a lady to drop her 
handkerchief in the path of the man whose attention she wished to draw.

  

Valentine week - 3

I would like to share my taste of movies, in this theme, romantic movies till date. The list is pretty common too. Enjoy them this time of the year.

“She did. You are the miracle” 

The sad movie adoption of book by Nicholas Sparks, “A Walk to Remember” is the best love story I have ever seen. People who read the book found movie not impressive. I read the book later and felt the movie had a dynamic approach and spirit of young love. However, both are worth exploring. The beginning of their love story is with a wonderful kiss and a date followed.

Moving on to Bollywood, it took a while for me to decide on my favorite. It might not be common. It actually is controversial. It is not the usual suspect of Dilwale Dulhaniya Le Jayenge or Kuch kuch hota hai or any such romance of SRK. It is Love Aaj Kal. I have more friends who just don’t dislike but hate the movie than who like it. It is an outlaw. Very few Indians can digest a newly wed woman running away. That is the love epiphany for her actually. I felt the true essence of the movie, what the director was putting forward can be summed up in the line, “Ek-o-ek kahani, bas badle zamana” Times change, people are now more practical. They have choices, even in people. But still the concept of monogamy and inertia in love is alive and it will be, in my view.

Romeo & Juliet, Devdas & Parvathi, Heer & Ranjha whoever died for love, would have chosen to live together at any cost and fought for it if they had a choice.

If I turn now towards my mother tongue, I have three all-time favorites. It is the routine list. One would be, Cheli of Gautham Menon. It is a beautiful, simple love story with awesome cast. The love epiphany for the male protagonist occurs immediately after he sees the girl. This happens when you have preset ideas of a perfect someone and you encounter him/her in a way just like you imagined. The plot is pretty romanticized but life in it is the elegance with which it is screened.

Another is the beautiful “Priyuralu Pilichindi” of two couples. It is the remake of “Sense & Sensibility” or could be called Indian adoption of book “Sense & Sensibility” of Jane Austen. It contrasts the idea of love between two sisters. It also has the sub-theme of women empowerment. It was great watching such gorgeous actresses and handsome actors work together with enchanting music. Love epiphany in this is pretty complicated. But you can see it in the case for younger sister more clearly.

The final choice in Tollywood would be “Sakhi”, the heights of romance from Mani Rathnam. It has the freshness of love and also has ingrained love epiphany with a phone call and also in the climax. Well, I got to say; I am disappointed that all my choices of Telugu movies are actually the remakes of Tamil versions.

I see many people feeling that romantic movies are easy to make. It is true. You just need three parts, a meeting for girl and the guy, a reason for parting or conflict and a climax, happy or sad. Well, you can see this is common theme for all the above but yet it is not enough. It takes immense chemistry and sensibility for making a Titanic or DDLJ after all. 

Valentine week - 4

"Aur waise bhi pyar hai kya, kya hai yeh pyar Payal. Hormones, Testosterone. Estrogen" - Tanu weds Manu

People over there who think love is in personal space and not an area for study, will be shocked to know that there has been extensive research in the field of psychology as well as physiology of love. Diving into psychology, there are few interesting theories I found online. Well, if you are one of those who think love is just to be experienced and not analyzed, I recommend not to proceed any further with the post.

Primarily, love was being categorized by many scholars based on the experience. Steinberg is the first one to compose love of three basic components and categorized it into 8 types with the level of each component. The basic components are Intimacy, Passion and Commitment. Intimacy is associated with bonding, the extent of closeness you experience in a relationship. Passion comprises of attraction, sexual component and such like. Commitment relates to the decision to stick to the relationship.

The picture needs to be read like this, for example, your relationship has high intimacy and passion but low on commitment, you need to check the line connecting high components, i.e romantic love. If your relationship is experiencing every element in abundance, it is called consummate love.

In addition, he describes if one is experiencing only intimacy it is liking, only passion, it is infatuation and only commitment, is empty love.

Another theory by Lee, connects types of love with colors. According to him, eros, ludus and storge(pronounced as store-gay) are primary colors of love. Eros represents the sexual component, ludus is all about skill and viewing love as a game where as storge stands for trust and stability. He says combination of eros and ludus lends Manic lover. This love type is “irrational, extremely jealous, obsessive, and often unhappy. Eros and storge leads to Agape. It is an all-giving selfless love style. Finally a mixture of ludus and storge will be a Pragmatic lover who shops for compatible partner.

I have a theory too. I am not a great psychologist or a love doctor. From what I could observe from people around me, I felt there are three kinds of relationships which are possible in youngsters. They are Habituated, Addicted and Actual love. 

Habituated starts due to getting into a relationship for the sake of having girlfriend/boyfriend. There is no attraction or attachment or missing when apart, but constant companionship for the sake of it. People tend to stay in it until there are attractions towards someone else. You can see it with people around you who follow duty of calling and meeting daily. People sometimes find it difficult to find a reason to end such relationship.

Addicted is another fallacy of love. This begins due to "care" mostly. Majorly in youngsters who stay away from home and find solace in a person who gives constant attention. Often this kind of a relationship leads to extremes of pain and pleasure. This is when people find it hard to realize it is not as what they think it is and get held up for a long time.

Actual love in youngsters is possible with a lot of understanding and commitment. Here you do not observe any mandatory calls of Habituation or possessiveness of Addiction, but enduring attachment and growing friendship. There is caring of Addiction and companionship of Habituation without the loss of self worth as in both.

I hope anything of it made sense!

Valentine week - 5

This post lets explore what great writers gotta say about the experience of love.

When you love, things make even more sense. - Paulo Coelho

To love is to lose control. - Paulo Coelho

Love is begun by time, and time qualifies the spark and fire of it. - William Shakespeare

I know not why
I love this youth; and I have heard you say. Love's reason's without reason. - William Shakespeare

Relationship is a structure, and love is unstructured. - Osho

Moving towards love is moving towards an abyss. One starts wavering, one feels dizzy. Go to a height in the Himalayas and look down at the valley; that valley is no-thing. When you look down at the valley of love, a tremendous fear grips you. You are almost paralyzed: you cannot run away, you cannot take the jump. You simply tremble in infinite fear. What to do? - Osho

I finally understood what true love meant...love meant that you care for another person's happiness more than your own, no matter how painful the choices you face might be. - Nicholas Sparks, Dear John

My daddy said, that the first time you fall in love, it changes you forever and no matter how hard you try, that feeling just never goes away. - Nicholas Sparks, The Notebook

"And when her lips met mine, I knew that I could live to be a hundred and visit every country in the world, but nothing would ever compare to that single moment when I first kissed the girl of my dreams and knew that my love would last forever." - Nicholas Sparks

"I held her close to me with my eyes closed, wondering if anything in my life had ever been this perfect and knowing at the same time that it hadn't. I was in love, and the feeling was even more wonderful than I ever imagined it could be." - Nicholas Sparks

There is always some madness in love. But there is also always some reason in madness. - Friedrich Nietzsche

To love is to receive a glimpse of heaven. - Karen Sunde